From Outgoing to Shy: My Journey of Learning a New Language in a New Country and Finding my Outgoing Self Again
- Learn English with NETOL
- Mar 22
- 7 min read
Updated: Apr 6
From Outgoing to Shy
My name is Daniela Ring. I immigrated from Romania to Canada many years ago. This move was a big change for me. Before the move, I felt excited and nervous at the same time. I thought my hardest challenge would be leaving my home country, my family and my friends, but that was not the case. After I moved to Canada, I realized that the most difficult challenge was learning a new language. I struggled to speak and understand English from the moment I arrived in Canada, and this struggle made me feel isolated and alone. In Romania, I was outgoing, confident, and cheerful; however, in Canada, I became shy, insecure, and self-doubting as I tried to speak a new language.
The Outgoing Me in Romania
In Romania, I had a very busy social life and I easily started conversations with anyone I met. Birthday parties, family events, gatherings with friends, or simple hangouts at a coffee shop always felt welcoming to me. I grew up in a large family and in a culture that values connection and open expression, which helped me become outgoing. I enjoyed talking with people and learning about their lives. My family and friends always said that I filled every room with joy and energy.
The Shift from Outgoing to Shy in Canada
Once I moved to Canada, I felt full of hope and ready for a brand new start in a new country. However, I soon found out that reality was not as I expected it to be. My English language skills were very basic, and the language barrier made everyday life difficult. I felt that the lively person I once was, was slowly disappearing because of my self-doubt and lack of confidence in myself. Every time I tried to speak, I struggled to form my sentences, mixing up words and finding it hard to pronounce them correctly.
My language barrier became a real problem during the first few months of living in Canada. Public spaces I once loved, such as coffee shops, the mall, or the market felt frightening. Each simple outing became a challenge, and I avoided conversations, choosing to remain silent to hide my fears. Yet, I was determined to find my voice in this beautiful new country I now call home.
My Journey of Learning English
In order for me to overcome my shyness and fears, I decided that I needed to learn English. Here are a few things that I did which helped me learn English:
I enrolled in a local English as a second language class where I met students from all around the world.
I practiced my English speaking skills at home with my family and outside of the house, at stores and restaurants.
I practiced my English listening skills by listening to the radio in the morning and watching English shows and movies on television.
I practiced my English reading skills by turning on the closed captions on my TV while watching shows or movies and reading simple books that I got at the library.
I practiced my writing skills by looking up new words that I did not know in the dictionary or online every day. Once I found the definitions, I would copy them into a notebook that I called New English Words. This is a practice that I still do today.
The Road to Becoming Outgoing Again
After some time and effort, I reached an important moment in my journey of learning English where I noticed that my confidence in using the language had improved and my shyness had decreased. So, I decided to get a volunteer job to further improve my English language skills.
I chose to get a volunteer job because, during my English as a Second Language (ESL) class, my teacher taught a lesson about the importance and benefits of volunteering. She explained that volunteering gives language learners an excellent opportunity to practice English while helping others. She also emphasized that volunteering provides important job experience needed to get a good job in Canada.
I volunteered at the library once a week. I was very nervous at first, but over time, I became more comfortable and gained confidence with each volunteering session. This volunteer experience helped me improve my English language skills. I volunteered at the library for about a year before deciding to leave my volunteer job to focus on getting a full-time job. To my surprise, I was asked to apply for a position at the library, in the children's department. After applying and interviewing for the position, I was offered the job. I still work at that library to this day, and I absolutely love my job.
Reflecting on My Journey
As I look back on my journey of moving to a new country and learning a new language, I am very thankful for everything that I have experienced, both good and bad. Changing from an outgoing Romanian woman to a shy observer in a new country was eye-opening. Through determination, I regained my confidence, made new friends, and created meaningful connections within my new community.
Learning a new language is more than just learning new words; it is a way to grow and evolve. Whether you are beginning your journey in Canada or elsewhere in the world, remember that your unique personal qualities and traits will always stay with you.
12 Tips for Newcomers: Staying Outgoing While Learning a New Language in a New Country
If you are a newcomer who has relocated to a new country and encountering language difficulties, here are 12 important tips that may help you maintain your outgoing personal quality:.
Practice English Every Day
Explanation: Try to speak, listen, read, and write English every day. It helps you become more comfortable with the language over time.
Example: Every day, try to start conversations in English by asking a random person for a recommendation or assistance at different places such as coffee shops, grocery stores, or the mall.
Watch TV Shows and Movies in English
Explanation: Watching shows and movies in English helps you learn how native speakers talk and use expressions.
Example: Watch a favourite series in English with subtitles; pause and replay parts to understand the conversation better.
Read Simple Books in English
Explanation: Reading simple books can improve your vocabulary and help you understand sentence structure without making you feel overwhelmed.
Example: Choose a beginner level novel or short story, then discuss the story with a relative, friend, or teacher to practice speaking.
Use a Dictionary for New Words
Explanation: When you find a word you do not know, use a dictionary to check its meaning and how it is used in a sentence.
Example: If you hear a new word in a conversation, look it up on your phone or a paper dictionary to practice using it later in sentences.
Join an English as a Second Language (ESL) Class
Explanation: Enrolling in an ESL class can significantly improve your English language skills. These classes help you learn new words and improve your speaking and understanding abilities.
Example: Register for a daily ESL in-person or online class at an English school. In your classes, make sure to join group discussions, complete class activities, and get advice from experienced teachers. This practice will help you use English in everyday situations.
Join a Community Group
Explanation: Community groups are a safe space to practice English with people who share similar interests. You can learn everyday expressions and make new friends.
Example: Attend local meetups, book clubs, or sports clubs where local members speak English, enabling you to practice and learn new phrases.
Make New Friends
Explanation: New friendships give you a natural opportunity to practice English in friendly conversations.
Example: Invite a neighbour or co-worker for coffee, then discuss simple topics like hobbies or favourite movies, which helps improve your language skills.
Volunteer Locally
Explanation: Volunteering helps you use English in real-life tasks and supports your local community, making language learning meaningful and practical.
Example: Help at a community centre or charity event, where you interact with native speakers and use English to complete everyday tasks.
Write a Daily Journal in English
Explanation: Writing every day improves your grammar, spelling, and ability to form sentences in English.
Example: Spend a few minutes each night writing about your day, what you learned, or how you felt, then review your journal to see your progress.
Think in English
Explanation: Try to form your thoughts directly in English. This practice helps you speak more fluently and reduces the need to translate in your head.
Example: When you plan your day or decide what to do, try thinking about these plans in English. Over time, this practice will make speaking English feel more natural.
Do Not Be Afraid to Make Mistakes
Explanation: Making mistakes is a normal part of learning any language. Each mistake is a chance to learn and improve.
Example: When speaking with someone, if you mispronounce a word or mix up your grammar, ask for help and be proud of the progress you make.
Enjoy the Process of Learning
Explanation: Enjoyment makes learning a new language easier and more fun. When you have fun, you will want to practice your English speaking, listening, reading, and writing skills more often.
Example: Learn English by listening to songs, playing games, or engaging in other fun activities where you can interact and connect with others, and maybe even laugh over small mistakes.
Continue Exploring This Topic with These Resources
For an engaging lesson and activities on this reading - From Outgoing To Shy, visit NETOL's Learning Corner. or click here to view the lesson & activities: From Outgoing To Shy
For an engaging lesson and activities on this topic - Understanding Personal Qualities & Traits, visit NETOL's Learning Corner. or below to view the edublog or the lesson & activities: Understanding Personal Qualities & Traits Edublog OR Lesson & Activities
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